Self Pity

Well, guess what, Self-Pity took me down for the last couple of weeks.   Just when you think you have it all together, out jumps self-pity and grabs a hold of your spirit and tries to take you down.

 

I guess my spirit is screaming at me to look at this topic of Self Pity, so that I will be prepared the next time it rears its ugly head. 

 

 I don’t really want to do this, but I guess I will muster up some courage and look at the phenomenon and thought process that creeps into my mind and spirit when I least expect it.  

 

I need to remember that knowledge is power.  Oh, that is not completely right.  Remember this quote:

So, I guess if I research self-pity and gain the knowledge and store it in my brain, when the self-pity demon surfaces again, I will be prepared to take action and prevent a downward spiral. 

 

 Wow, it sounds so easy.  Let us continue down this path of reasoning.  Get ready brain to store this information because I am sick and tired of being drug down into the pit of self-pity and depression.  I guess that brain power is under-rated.  

I need to know my enemy.  Ok, lets continue to travel along this journey a little further.  

 

 

What is Self-Pity?  

Self-pity Definition:   Self- Pity is an emotion in which one feels sympathy, sorrow, pity towards the self — in regards to one’s own internal and external experiences of suffering.  

 

Self-pity has also been defined as an emotion “directed towards others with the goal of attracting attention, empathy or help” (Comparison of what others have that I do not have) i.e. someone to share their life with.  

 

So, according to this, self-pity starts with an emotion and then invites the brain to the pity-party and the brain obliges by engaging the negative thoughts in the mix.   

The brain starts comparing your situation with others. Then the emotional feeling of loss enters into the mix. Then sadness.

How do I know this? Just been through all this. Who knew that taking this time to process the past can and will help to prevent suffering in the future.

Now my brain is standing on guard for me and will help me take a stand the next time my emotions want to take me down that path.

I always considered myself so unique because I could feel and have passion for life. I grew up being told to squash my emotions and just follow through. Now I am learning and practicing the (AAA) I always bring up in my writings. (Awareness, Accept, Action).

Aware and Accept that my emotions are running amuck and then take the necessary Action, to use the knowledge stored in the brain to bridle my emotions before they start taking me spiraling and sliding down the pity-me slimy debilitating pit of despair and depression.

Suffering:

• Out of balance (dis ease) out of ease (balance) and in great trouble

• Stress: Physical or mental strain

• Pain – Conscious endurance of pain or distress

• Loss – losing someone important by death or divorce or abandonment

• Sickness or poverty

• Pain too intense to be bear

• Loneliness, Rejection, Abandonment, victimization thoughts

• Pain leads to negative thinking

Negative thinking:

So, I guess I need to research what types of negative thoughts will sneak up on me to steal my joy and peace and serenity, so I am prepared and ready for battle

This list is a little too much, so I will just allow my brain to refer to this list, when I get out of balance and then help me get clarity on which one of these nine are rearing its ugly head.

I got this!!! I guess this is called learning “Self Control”… who knew I would be working on self-control, taming my out of control emotions, taming and taking captive negative thoughts and compulsive thoughts and using the AAA (Aware, Accept, Action) principles to defuel their power over me.

I cannot believe I am saying this but “Thank you brain”… I do need you…Now do not get me wrong, sometimes I get compulsive thoughts and negative thoughts and you too, brain need to be disciplined. I can over think things and not tap into the divine knowledge and divine wisdom of the ages which is always available from the divine creator.

For 32 years, I have been reciting these prayers, for God to help me work on my character flaws that seem to be sabotaging my happiness and peace. Thank you God for each awareness. I then need to accept the challenge and take action to change those negative behaviors to positive behaviors.

Over the Holidays, watch out for the Pity-Me’s. Do not let the pity me syndrome jump on you and try to take you down. Do not let it sabotage your peace and serenity.

Call someone and talk to someone you trust to release the strong emotions of loss, anger, sadness and hurt before those emotions and thoughts gain power in your mind.

There is nothing wrong with feeling the feelings; however, dwelling on those feelings can overwhelm you. Getting them out to a counselor or a close confident will make life more bearable.

I learned on the camino, in regards to physical pain, which there was a lot of, If I talked to someone or took my mind off the pain, it seemed to diminish for those moments.

What I give power has power. I will not let the physical pains gain power. Of course I took turmeric which helps with inflammation to help with the pain and then I turned it over to God and focused my thoughts on other things.

Start off your day making a choice to have an Attitude of Gratitude.

If your attitude starts to go downhill, tell your mind and emotions to “Snap out of it”

When you think positive thoughts, the negative thoughts must flee.

Ask God for help….

Love you all, Esther Mae December 1, 2021