Honesty

• Honesty is going to take you places in life that you never could have dreamed and it’s the easiest thing you can practice in order to be happy, successful and fulfilled.

• Honesty is part of the foundation of our core values and principles. Honesty cuts through deception and knifes its way through deceit and lies.

• Honesty leads to a fulfilling, free life.

• Honesty is not just about telling the truth. It’s about being real with yourself and others about who you are and learning your true self.

• Honesty promotes openness, empowers us and enables us to develop consistency in how we present the facts.

• Honesty sharpens our perception and allows us to observe everything around us with clarity.

• Honesty prevents actions that produce guilt and remorse feelings

• Opposite of honesty is deception, lying

Definition: Honesty is not only speaking the truth but practicing the truth

Many children think honesty means you “don’t tell a lie”– and that is definitely part of being honest. But honesty means more than not lying. A more complete definition of honesty shows that an honest person is true to who they are and their values

This rings true to the statement you hear in AA,

“Do the next right thing”

Why is Honesty Important:

• Honesty is not just about telling the truth to self and others

• Honesty is It about being real with yourself and others about who you are

• Honesty is knowing what you want and what you need to live your most authentic life

• Honesty promotes openness

• Honesty empowers us

• Honesty enables us to develop consistency in how we present the facts

What are qualities of an honest person?

An honest person is someone that is

• Truthful

• Trustworthy

• Loyal

• Fair

• sincere

• Genuine

Honesty is a facet of moral character that connotes positive and virtuous attributes such as

• Integrity -implies trustworthiness and incorruptibility to a degree that one is incapable of being false to a trust, responsibility or pledge

• Truthfulness – refusal to lie, steal or deceive in any way

• Straightforwardness, including straightforwardness of conduct

• Honor -suggests an active or anxious regard for the standards of one’s profession, calling or position.

• Probity – means uprightness of character in motion (implies tried and proven honesty or integrity

• Honesty also involves being trustworthy, loyal, fair, and sincere.

What does honesty show in a person?

• Respectable, admired behavior is always carried out with honesty.

• Telling the truth and backing it up with actions show respect for what’s right and an esteem for ethical and moral integrity.

• Honesty is one of the key components to our character and one of the most admired traits of any successful, responsible person.

Why is it important to be honest with self and others?

• I have learned that giving unsolicited advice usually does not work

• Suggestion: Ask the person, if they would like your opinion?

• If they say no, accept it.

• If they say yes, they have now given themselves permission to hear you…

• By telling someone an inconvenient truth honest people put that person’s growth and well-being above their own feelings, because there may be a rebellious kick-back from that person.

• We have to make sure we do not take the kick-back personally. Recognizing this, helps us maintain our peace and serenity.

• By being honest with ourselves about our flaws and defects, allows us to start the process of healing and gives us courage to change into a better person.

• We come to realize that telling the truth is the right thing to do

• Timing and how we deliver the truth is just as important as the truth itself.

• Ask God to help you deliver the truth with the correct tone and to deliver the truth with love, not judgment.

• Ask God for the correct timing to share certain truths with others.

• If a truth will cause more injury, then we need to seek counsel on whether to share.

Truth Be Told: 16 Ways to Demonstrate Honesty

Think before you speak.

Sometimes we need to process what we want to say with someone else first

Before speaking your truth, Ask the other person, “Would you like my opinion?” By doing this, the other person gives you permission to speak into their lives. It opens their mind, heart and spirit to your version of the truth you are about to say.

Say what you mean and mean what you say. (Actions speak louder than words)

Bend over backward to communicate in an open and honest way.

Simplify your statements so that everyone clearly understands your message.

Tell it like it is rather than sugarcoating it.

Present both sides of each issue to engender objectivity.

If you have a personal bias or a conflict of interest, make it known.

Tell people the rationale behind your decisions so that your intent is understood.

If something is misinterpreted, quickly correct the record.

Don’t shoot the messenger when someone tells you the truth. Thank them for their honesty and treat the information provided as a gift to be pondered and considered.

Be willing to accept responsibility by admitting a mistake or an error in judgment — in a timely fashion.

Hold people accountable when their words do not match their actions.

Never compromise your integrity and reputation by associating yourself with people whose standards of integrity you mistrust.

Please proceed with caution because your truth may not be their truth

Many times we feel safer around direct, honest people. They speak their minds, and we know where we stand with them. However, their truth spoken, may or may not be your truth. That is why it is advisable to get your spiritual mentors and higher power involved.

People who gossip about others to you, will gossip about you to others…

No one is perfect and occasionally a trustworthy person will make mistakes

Indirect people, people who are afraid to say who they are, what they want, and what they’re feeling, cannot be trusted. They will somehow act out their truth even though they do not speak it. And it may catch everyone by surprise.

• Directness saves time and energy.

• It removes us as victims.

• It dispenses with martyrdom and games.

• It helps us own our power.

• It creates respectful relationships.

It feels safe to be around direct, honest people. Be one. If you are not an honest direct person, find a person who has those qualities and ask them how they developed that character trait.

Today, I will own my power to be direct. I do not have to be passive, nor do I need to be aggressive. I will become comfortable with my own truth, so those around me can become comfortable with me.

I learned so much from this reading which I put together on honesty. We are all a work in progress. In my camino (way) here at home I will seek out honest friends. I will continue to work on being an honest trustworthy person. I will be the best me today.

“When I know better, I will do better”. It takes practice, practice, practice. Then I will “intuitively know what to do” most of the time, as it says in the AA promises.

Love you all. It is God’s Will for all of you to be as honest and trustworthy as you can be today. Keep your heart, mind and spirit open to learn how to more and more honest each day…. Esther