Is it ok to cry?

Hello Everyone:

After re-reading some of my posts I noticed how many times I cried.

I immediately felt weak and started to beat up on myself with harmful condescending thoughts, like a critical parent. What are my readers going to think about me?

My critical self-talk thoughts were like this:

“You were weak when you cried” “What is wrong with you?” “Why did you let someone’s words and actions affect you like that?” “You are 70 years old and you should know better!“ Why aren’t you stronger?” “You have been working a spiritual program for over 32 years and you still cannot master this?” “Why do you continue to let people’s words and actions hurt you and take you out of balance?” “Grow up” “Get tougher”

Wow, just writing my thoughts down gave them power and I do not like how I seem to hurt myself with such critical words.

Wow, I just realized, it was not the bully’s words and actions that hurt me the most, it was my inner dialog that did the most damage.

So how do I stop doing that.

I guess I will start with accepting the fact that maybe there is a good reason and purpose for crying and that it could be a natural and healthy phenomenon.

Acceptance, knowledge and understand may be the keys to break this toxic self-talk abuse which is negatively hurting and effecting my body, mind, spirit, and soul, causing imbalance and suffering.

I will try researching the definitions and seek human and divine knowledge and human and divine wisdom on the phenomenon of crying…

Reason I want to do this:

• I do not want to feel guilty and weak every time I cry

• I want to stop the self-destructive and abusive “critical parent” talk to myself

• I want to learn self-care behaviors that are productive and not destructive to my self-worth

• There are enough hurting people that hurt me without me hurting ourselves

• I want to see the benefits of crying to my body, mind, spirit, and soul

• Hopefully, I will be able to embrace crying as an important part of my spiritual growth

Is there a purpose for crying?

Follow me on this journey into definitions and famous quotes and let’s see how knowledge and wisdom of the ages can help me accept crying for what it is?

This quote indicated to me, that maybe I have put an expectation of the necessity to be perfect on myself, never getting upset…Having a belief that to get upset is not ok…I have to crush that idea and accept the fact that getting upset is built into my DNA. As it says, I need to realize that crying is part of the human experience…

This quote also tells me that it is ok to cry…however, crying, for too long a stretch, can be harmful and can take me down into a depression which can start to become a permanent dwelling place…which can become paralyzing…

This quote says: Snap out of it before the depression takes hold…

Don’t unpack and live there…

The action this quote suggests is: learn something from the experience, refocus

This quote tells me that tears are good…They announce an opportunity to make a change

So, according to this, tears are a sign that maybe I need to make a change

Pain in the body is a sign of (dis ease) that something is wrong physically

Pain that causes the tears to flow is a sign that emotionally or mentally or spiritually something is wrong and that pain indicate that a change may be necessary

Action may be necessary to relieve the cycle of pain

Tears are good

Tears show we are alive

Tears mean that we have a heart (spiritual heart)

When we connect to the Heart with feelings of love, appreciation, gratitude and other positive emotions, this field is able to communicate more effectively with the brain and body, and has a positive influence on other people and our environment.

So I guess it is important for my health, to give myself positive affirmations and practice good healthy self-care behaviors. Physical: Exercise, Good food, proper rest Mental: practicing positive thoughts and affirmations and staying away from toxic people Spiritual: Connecting and asking for help from a higher power of love and acceptance and forgiveness.

Love relationships with friends, family, pets, God, or planet Earth are powerful ways to open and expand the gateway of the Spiritual Heart

When one or more of these relationship with friends, family, pets, God or planet earth become toxic, then our spiritual heart is sad and cries… a normal response…

I guess this is where “a broken heart” comes from… Broken heart syndrome is a temporary heart condition that’s often is brought on by stressful situations and extreme emotions.

From this knowledge, it would appear, that crying, could be a good and healthy thing, releasing all of the pent-up extreme emotions that could cause a heart attack. Who knew that crying could do that… This is an important self-care skill in regards to what I call “swallowing untrue hurtful words from those who should be loving us and supporting us”. If you keep swallowing and believing untrue mean words, it builds up and thus, just like a pressure cooker, these emotions need to be released. Crying provides this release….

So, according to what we learned so far, crying is a wakeup call to have a chance to see what changes are necessary to guard your spiritual heart? Use our brains to intercept harmful and bullying words and do not allow them to enter your sacred heart space.

Proverbs 4:23-27 NLT: Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. Avoid all perverse talk; stay away from corrupt speech. Look straight ahead and fix your eyes on what lies before you. Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.

Keep being kind and doing the next right thing… Do not let other’s negative attitudes take you out of balance…Do not take their toxic words into your spiritual heart…

Practice, Practice, practice…If we get caught off guard and those toxic words sneak into our spiritual hearts, we need to cry and release them out of there and learn and practice once again, how to guard our hearts…

You can give words to your tears if you ask, “God Help Me”. This opens the door for divine knowledge and wisdom to enter and give enlightenment on the situation…

“When we know better, we do better”..

Crying is not just reserved for women. Men have a more difficult time with this because of the cultural training, however, I believe the same principles apply to men. Maybe that is why more men have problems with heart attacks…

Accept crying as a normal and natural part of learning and growing and maturing and taking care of yourself and your mental, physical and spiritual health. Crying also serves as a way to grieve losses of loved ones, things, and life experiences. We need to grieve and cry the losses in our lives so we have room for what God wants to give us in the future. Sometimes, we are not given a reason why we are crying, we just need to cry.

Accept that you need to cry and own it and it will do what it is supposed to do. Just do not stay in in too long. Engage the brain, to get back to life…

I found that fighting crying, makes it worse…. Just cry and then move on…

If any of you are going to a rough time, open up your mind, body, heart and spirit to allow someone, who shows up in your life, to walk with you for a while and share your pain and encourage you to pursue the path you are choosing for the moment.

God send them. Don’t reject them. Appreciate those special people who show up on your way in life (camino) to provide this encouragement and hope for you. Keep following the path you have chosen and it will get easier. You always have the choice to change your attitude or make changes along the way or even change course.

“Take control of your habits. Take control of your life.” Anonymous

Love you all, Esther Mae